I'll admit that in the beginning when I realized the severity of my condition I did get emotional. When the drug high finally cleared I made the decision that this disease wouldn't defeat me. Instead of NMO being who I am, it will only be a part of me. I remember a therapist asking me in early days who I was. I thought it was an easy assignment except when I started listing my attributes he pointed out that they were just things I did, not elements of my being.
I remember speaking with a Mom who has NMO. I asked her how she managed being a parent with our condition and she said, "you know what? Having kids is a good thing. They don't give me a chance to think about how much it hurts." I feel that way about work, my hobbies, my social life.
So, I guess the reverse is also true.
This week I spent more than my usual share speaking with other NMO patients, reading the support group posts and educating others. I love being able to be there for others however focusing on NMO highlighted how it affects me. Suddenly I had trouble sleeping, my legs felt like lead and the fatigue kicked in. I also noticed that the support group identified that a lot of patients had increased symptoms after the patient day event in LA. Now, there are obviously a lot of factors to consider but I can't help but wonder if we influence each other more than we identify.
It must be true that it's best with everything in moderation.
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